"Fire that's so contagious it's taking over me and you can't stop it."
Lately I've been craving to stand out. To be completely weird in today's society, to just go crazy and not care what anyone else thinks. I'm sick of the norm. I want drastic change, and I want it now.
Every day life is mundane. It's not that I'm not grateful-- I love every moment that Jesus chooses to give me. But it feels like I'm breathing in apathy instead of oxygen. People merely pass me by. They don't care about my story. They don't know that I'm sincerely interested in theirs.
My mom says I'm feeling rebellious, but I really don't think that's it. I still want to abide by the rules-- I still want to do my homework, run track, read my Bible diligently, worship Jesus with all that I am. I just want to start headfirst in the opposite direction of the crowd. Not only do I want my actions to reflect my differentness, I want my appearance to as well. We're supposed to be a peculiar people... why not go all out?
"They see us coming from miles away. There's no hiding or denying 'cause we're not ashamed. With our hands up in the air, boys and girls, they start to stare. It's a wonder... can you feel it?"
No, I don't want to wear black or get a tongue piercing or anything of that sort. No tattoos or markings. Though I am considering a wild hairstyle or a random wardrobe. I don't know. Something. Something to let everyone know that God made me unique just like He made them unique. That even though I'm crazy, I'm crazy for Jesus.
"If I acted crazy; I did it for God; if I acted overly serious, I did it for you. Christ's love has moved me to such extremes. His love has the first and last word in everything we do." --2 Corinthians 5:13-14
I mean, I've been completely filled up on the inside. Shouldn't it overflow to the outside? I'm a fanatic.. is it wrong to look like one?
lyrics from "Glow" by Britt Nicole